Stammering or stuttering can happen as a part of normal speech and language development. Children’s speech and language skills develop so quickly during their early years that it is hard for their brains to keep up and stammering can result. Most children typically outgrow this type of developmental stammering, but the following tips can help if you are concerned. It’s important to note that parent’s DON’T cause stammering, but changes to the environment and our communication styles can be really helpful in reducing or stopping stammering. These tips are also just helpful for supporting any child to talk – stammer or not!
1. Slow down the pace
We live very busy and fast paced lives and many of us are often left feeling rushed, including kids.
Slowing down your pace of talking can be really helpful in ensuring your child doesn’t feel rushed. Modelling a nice, slow, calm pace to them will likely cause them to mirror you. Pause more between words and phrases, take your time to respond to questions or statements and give them plenty of time to respond.
Try to avoid telling your child to slow down as this can be hard for them to do and instead do the above and SHOW them how to slow down.
It can be helpful to try and slow down the pace of life overall. It might help to pinpoint parts of the day that feel particularly rushed and try to put some strategies in place to reduce feeling rushed.
2. Asking questions
We all naturally ask children questions all the time. However, for the child with a stammer, this can put the pressure on and overload them.
Avoid bombarding them with questions e.g. “how was nursery? Did you see your friend Poppy? Did you play on the slide together?”
Ask ONE question at a time and give them plenty of time to respond
Avoid asking complicated questions
Try making a statement instead e.g. “I had a ham sandwich for lunch, I wonder what you had for your lunch” or even just “I had a ham sandwich for lunch” and see what happens!
3. Really REALLY listen
We all struggle to really listen sometimes, especially in our busy lives with endless distractions
Give your child eye contact, so that they know you are listening to them
Respond with facial expressions and nodding
Try to focus on WHAT they are saying i.e. the message, instead of HOW they are saying i.e. their speech or their stammer
4. Take turns
We all naturally take turns in conversations, but we do often interrupt one another and overlap. This can be hard for young children who are working really hard to think of what to say, but also when to jump into an appropriate gap in conversation.
Reinforce taking turns to speak as a family
Try having an object, such as a ball, that is the “talking ball” – model asking for the ball so it can be your turn to talk and pass it on when you are finished
5. Build confidence
Of course we know that you’re always full of praise for your child, but really focus on their strengths OTHER than talking and give them lots of positive feedback.
Give specific praise e.g. “I saw that you put all of your toys away in the box where they belong. That was really really helpful, I’m proud of you”.
6. Have special time
This is probably our most important tip. Special time really is just that. Special time with just you and your child with nobody else and NO distractions i.e. no phones, no TV, no tablets. It’s often easier said than done, but a really really powerful way of supporting your child.
Give your child 5 minutes of your undivided attention per day
This might be playing, talking, cuddling or reading a book – anything really that your child will value!
It gives you time to give your full attention and focus on one aspect of communication whether that’s asking them less questions or slowing down your own pace of talking
Remember, absolutely no parent is perfect, so please be kind to yourselves. These strategies can be hard to implement in the hustle and bustle of everyday life! Give yourself small achievable goals everyday, such as asking less questions at home time or trying special time out once that week. And if you need more support, feel free to contact us here.
